The Art of Being Yourself (part 1)
- Tina Avila
- Nov 14
- 7 min read
Updated: 2 days ago
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Just be yourself. That’s the message we receive from culture today.
Well that can be hard to discern! It’s one thing to resolve to live into your authentic self. It’s another to figure out who that actually is. Who am I exactly? Who am I, really? That question echoes in the quiet moments when our titles or roles fall away.
Our sense of identity comes from our understanding of who we are. And who we are is largely attributed to the sense of belonging we have to the things or the people we identify with.
Whether it’s your vocation, your family of origin, your community, your hobbies and pastimes, your religion or lack thereof, your ethnicity, culture, or political affiliations—your identity is, in some ways, a mosaic of all of it—each piece shaping how you see yourself and how you move through the world. And while that mosaic can be beautiful, it can also become fragile.
The trouble is when we expect these identity sources to do more for us than they are meant to. They cannot be the ultimate source of identity. They might give you some idea of what you do and what you’re all about, but only God can speak to your true identity. Only God can speak to the authentic self he created you to be. He is the source.
Here is just some of the self-care, self-help jargon on social media ready to counsel you into a better life:
Live your authentic self and you’ll live a happy life.
Always be your true, authentic self and you’ll attract the right kind of people.
Embrace your authentic self. Your true power lies in not caring what others think.
The common thread is looking inward to discover who we are. It sounds empowering at first, but here’s the problem I keep bumping into whenever I try to live that out: I can’t always trust what’s inside me to define me. I lean towards selfishness, self-preservation, pride, and comfort at all costs. Depending on my sleep habits or monthly cycle I might just give into every anxious thought that comes creeping in. Truth is, I won’t thrive the way I long to if it were up to me and my inner voice. And I won’t live a flourishing life if I’m leaning on my external successes to define my sense of worth either.
Your identity can’t be tied to your strengths, your weaknesses, your emotions, or your activities. In fact, it cannot come from inside you to begin with!
The most common struggle with identity is separating the things we do from who God says we are. And this is why I’m thrilled to share such a meaningful story from the life of Jesus about his own identity.
Jesus lived in obscurity for most of his life. When he finally enters centre stage to begin his public ministry, he doesn’t kick things off with a public healing, a sermon, a discipleship training session, or heated debate.
No, Jesus’ public ministry starts with baptism.
The three Synoptic Gospels—Matthew, Mark, and Luke, all include the account of the baptism of Jesus, and John’s Gospel also references the baptism, which speaks to the significance of the event.
His cousin, John the Baptist, was the last of a long line of prophets to urge God’s people to repent and prepare for the Lord’s coming. I wonder what John must have been thinking as he saw Jesus making his way down to the Jordan River. John was baptizing people and calling them to repentance. So it’s no surprise that he was confused when Jesus asked John to baptism him.
But Jesus did not receive baptism because he was a sinner that needed to repent and be cleansed from his sins. Jesus was baptized in order to completely identify with the sinful people he came to save. This was the same heart posture that would eventually lead Jesus to the cross—the ultimate identification with the sinful people he loves.
Once John understood that he was to baptize Jesus, he plunged him into the waters. As he emerged, Scripture says that heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.”
In that breathtaking moment, the Trinity was fully revealed—Father, Son, and Spirit—just as they had been present at creation. The Spirit of God hovered over the waters, the Word of God who spoke creation into being, and God the Father lovingly presiding over all of it.
At the dawn of time, the Godhead created life itself. And to paraphrase Romans 5:6, at just the right time… Jesus came to give us new life.
This is what’s so meaningful about Jesus’ baptism when it comes to identity:
As Jesus stepped into the Jordan that day, he looked like anyone else. He was a regular guy who hadn’t done anything remotely significant or note-worthy. And yet God declared the truth of Jesus' identity over him at the moment. Before Jesus did anything to earn it, God declared his love and good pleasure over Jesus.
“This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17 NIV)
Let’s not miss this! Identity was spoken over Jesus by the Father before he did anything to earn it. His identity as the Son of God was declared before he had anything to show for it. Before and miracles, sermons, or crowds—love came first. His identity was sealed. Before he did anything good, he was loved by God and God was pleased with him. Before he overcame the temptations of the wilderness, God publicly declared, this is my Son. And I love him. And I’m so pleased with him.
What’s Also True for Us
Let me make this connection for us in case our own insecurities are keeping these loose ends untied: the same principle applies to us.
That same voice that spoke over Jesus speaks over us, too. Before we do anything to earn God’s love and approval, we have it. When we surrender our lives to Jesus in faith, God gives us the righteousness of Jesus and puts it on us. We need not make all the right decisions and do all the right things for God to love us or delight in us. He simply does because we are his children.
Many people put off getting baptized until they can clean up their act. They tally up their good and bad deeds, hoping to tip the scales in their favor. How tragic, since we already have God’s favor! In fact, it’s all rigged in our favor!
We could never do enough to earn God’s love and approval, and that’s what makes the Gospel such good news. We receive it by faith. And we don’t receive it by mustering up enough faith, we receive it because of the faithfulness of Jesus to step in and take our place. Take our sin, our shame, our death. His faithfulness wins our righteousness.
Identity through Prayer
It’s also worth recognizing that despite these events appearing to some extent in all four Gospels, Luke is the only Gospel writer to point out that Jesus was praying to the Father when this blessing was spoken over him. He wasn’t focused on what was happening around him, how he was being perceived, or what people were saying about it. He was he focused on the Father. He was tuned into God.
Just imagine what God could speak over us if we pause long enough to listen in prayer. If our identity is rooted in God’s voice, not our own, prayer becomes the posture that tunes our hearts to hear him.
Ephesians 3 captures this truth so beautifully. I regularly read it over to myself so that the words can sink down deep.
For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. (Ephesians 3:14-19 NIV)
Non-Action Steps
Normally, I’d end with practical action steps, but this truth isn’t something we achieve, it’s something we receive.
So in light of received identity, I am providing 31 identity markers with Scripture references attached—one for each day of the month. I encourage you to read the identity and look up the Scripture every day for a month and allow the truth of God’s Word to speak into your identity.
Who I am in Christ according to Scripture
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What’s in the Ears
This is the part where I share a song or podcast I’m currently into. The song I’m sharing today is titled Firm Foundation (He Won’t) by Anthem Worship. It talks about how despite everything around being unstable, Christ is our firm foundation. Let me know if you check it out!
If this stirred something in you, share this post with a friend or drop a comment below. I’d love to hear what small step you’re taking towards the flourishing life today! And don’t forget to subscribe so you don’t miss a thing.
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